Self-esteem in psychology. What is overestimated, underestimated, adequate, types, how to increase, raise

What is self-esteem

Self-esteem is how a person sees himself, how he imagines himself and his place among other people. Day after day we make conclusions about our character, habits, abilities, compare ourselves with others, draw conclusions, try to change, become better, more perfect. Some consider themselves superior to others, more successful or more talented. Others, on the contrary, suffer from imperfection and dissimilarity to the chosen ideal.

From early childhood, self-esteem determines a person’s behavior, mood, and internal balance of feelings. The child begins to evaluate himself without learning to speak properly. The baby may cry because he is not able to fasten his sandals.

“That means I’m worse than my mother,” the three-year-old toddler thinks, and his self-esteem is rapidly falling.

And if mom reminds you that neighbor Slavik has been dressing and putting on his shoes himself for a long time, well, consider that the beginning of a low self-esteem complex has been laid.

The way a person evaluates himself leaves an imprint on his entire life. High or low self-esteem is equally dangerous. A biased assessment of one’s own strengths and weaknesses leads to the fact that a person is perceived inadequately by others. It is difficult to evaluate oneself objectively, and yet, in the words of the English philosopher Francis Bradley, “every person is what he thinks of himself.”

Methods to improve low self-esteem

Self-esteem in psychology is a phenomenon that is considered from different points of view. Depending on this, the methods of influencing patients suffering from low self-esteem also differ. In this regard, there are several methods of self-improvement.

Fixed role therapy technique

This technique was developed by George Kelly, whose works belong to the cognitive school of psychology.

The principle of treatment consists of several stages:

  • First, the patient is asked to write a story about himself in the third person. He must evaluate himself from the point of view of another person.
  • Next, the doctor examines the resulting essay and identifies those characteristics that the patient pays attention to when he evaluates other people.
  • After this, the therapist himself draws up an outline of the fixed role, endowing the patient with the qualities that he lacks. The patient's name is not used. The doctor is using a fictitious identity.
  • At the next stage, the patient is asked to play the role of that fictional character and try to feel the same confidence in himself.
  • For 3 weeks, the patient must read an essay prepared by the therapist and try to be like the main character.

Methodology for compensating for deficiencies

Compensatory processes of the psyche were considered by D. Dobson and N. Pelt. They were based on the fact that a person with low self-esteem also has greater health problems than those who value themselves more. On the basis of this theory, a methodology was created, which is based on the so-called inventory of advantages, as well as disadvantages.

The principle of working with a patient is that the therapist asks him to write down his main advantages and disadvantages on a piece of paper. At the same time, the negative aspects of your personality need to be divided into several groups: those that can be changed and unchangeable shortcomings. The first category includes disadvantages that, with hard work, can be changed and turned into advantages.

For example, shyness can be classified as such. Partially, it can be overcome through exercise. Many people believe that appearance flaws should be listed in the group of unchangeable qualities. But that's not true. Thanks to sports training and the right clothes, you can get rid of such problems.

However, a permanent disadvantage may include, for example, short stature. To get rid of such a complex, the therapist suggests using a compensation method. Let's say a young man is unsure of himself because of his height. In this case, he should pay more attention to his intellectual development.

Psychologists recommend that parents act on the same principle. If they see that a child is significantly inferior to his peers in terms of physical indicators, then more effort must be made for his development in an intellectual environment.

This principle also works in the opposite direction. For example, if a girl complains that everyone only pays attention to her outstanding appearance, then it is not necessary to change her hairstyle or hide her beauty. It is enough to develop in a different direction and then it will be the first to catch the eye of others.

Behavior Skills Training

This technique was developed in the behavioral school of psychology. Therapeutic activities consist of performing a kind of rehearsal of behavior. That is, the patient is taught behavioral skills that are characteristic of a person with higher self-esteem.

Classes are also conducted on the ability to communicate with other people. During such rehearsals, the patient tries on the image of a more confident person and records this feeling.

In fact, it is a training session in which the client plays a role. If, on the contrary, he suffers from increased self-esteem, then he may fall into the role of a person who must apologize to everyone for any wrongdoing. In this case, the patient speaks not on his own behalf, but on behalf of a fictional character.

This makes it much easier for him to try himself in a new capacity. After several such rehearsals, people change their behavior and learn to use different communication skills.

The same principle can be used at home. For example, a person has an important meeting ahead of him, which he is very afraid of. In this situation, it is worth deciding what exactly he will say, with what intonations and facial expression. After this, all that remains is to rehearse your speech, preferably in front of a mirror.

It is worth considering that self-esteem is a very complex characteristic. Therefore, not all methods used in psychology are able to immediately change a person’s behavior and his opinion about himself.

It's a long job. The therapist can use several methods to increase self-esteem, depending on the personality type. It is especially difficult for those diagnosed with mixed self-esteem, as such people are often confused about their own emotions. However, anyone can do the exercises described above at home.

Classification

Self-esteem is present in every person. For some, it is presented in its infancy, at the level of “better or worse,” “he can, but I can’t,” “they scold me, but I’m good.” This level of self-esteem is typical for children, but can persist in adults. More often than not, with age, a person forms a stable opinion about himself, which is difficult to correct.

There cannot be too much self-esteem - it is either enough or not enough. Depending on how sensibly a person approaches the assessment of his strengths, qualities, and actions, one can distinguish between an adequate and inadequate assessment. Self-esteem may depend on a specific situation or a person's mood. There are a great many criteria by which a person evaluates himself, but we can identify the most characteristic and inherent to most people.

Types of self-esteem

Adequate and inadequate

The difficulty in separating these two types is that a person always considers himself right in assessing his own merits and demerits. The level of adequacy is determined by the level of common sense, the ability to evaluate one’s actions and personal qualities.

Stable and floating

In the process of growing up, an attitude towards oneself is formed, an assessment of one’s abilities and capabilities. By a certain age, every person knows exactly whether he is capable of becoming an astronaut or a ballet dancer. At the same time, self-esteem is influenced by mood and achieved success: praise from a boss or loss in a competition can significantly increase or decrease the level of self-esteem.

General, private and situational

This division indicates the area or area of ​​self-esteem. You can have high overall self-esteem, but admit failure in economic affairs. Or vice versa, suffer from an inferiority complex, but be proud of successful children or voluminous hair.

When designating the type of self-esteem, concepts such as “good” or “bad” are not used. Self-esteem can be of different levels - high, low or average

Psychologists also use other ways to classify self-esteem. In particular, current self-esteem, or assessment based on achieved results, is highlighted; partial, depending on achievements in one area; potential, due to innate abilities and inclinations.

Depending on how a person treats his strengths and weaknesses, whether he underestimates or overestimates their significance in his own eyes, we can talk about different levels of self-esteem.

A high self-evaluation

Typically, it is generally accepted among ordinary people that having a high level of self-esteem a priori leads to a happy life and fulfillment in the professional sphere. However, this judgment, unfortunately, is far from the truth. Adequate self-esteem of an individual is not synonymous with a high level of self-esteem. Psychologists say that high self-esteem harms the individual no less than low self-esteem. An individual with high self-esteem is simply not able to accept and take into account other people's opinions, views, and attitudes towards the value system of others. High self-esteem can acquire negative forms of manifestation, expressed in anger and verbal defense.

Subjects with unstable high self-esteem tend to take a defensive position due to a far-fetched exaggeration of the threat, which can strike a blow to their self-esteem, level of confidence and hurt self-esteem. Therefore, such individuals are constantly in a tense and alert state. This enhanced defensive position indicates an inadequate perception of surrounding individuals and the environment, mental disharmony, and a low degree of self-confidence. Individuals with strong self-esteem, on the other hand, tend to perceive themselves with all the defects and flaws. They, as a rule, feel safe, as a result of which they are not inclined to blame others, use verbal defense mechanisms, or make excuses because of past mistakes and failures. There are two signs of dangerously high self-esteem: unreasonably high judgments about oneself and an increased level of narcissism.

In general, if an individual has a consistently high level of self-esteem, this is not so bad. Often parents, without realizing it themselves, contribute to the formation of an inflated level of self-esteem in the child. At the same time, they do not understand that if the child’s developed inflated self-esteem is not supported by real abilities, this will lead to a decrease in the child’s self-confidence and an inadequate level of self-esteem downward.

Levels of self-esteem

If we abstract from the types of self-esteem, we can distinguish high, low and adequate levels of self-esteem. The same thing can be expressed in slightly different words: high, low and average self-esteem. There is no fundamental difference here, the difference is only in the accepted formulations.

The idea of ​​average, or adequate self-esteem, has no clear boundaries. Just as it is difficult to characterize the “average”, inconspicuous person, it is not easy to describe average self-esteem in isolation from its extreme manifestations.

Adequate

It is a realistic perception of yourself, not too different from how others perceive you. A person with adequate self-esteem carries conscious confidence, his feelings are stable, and his mental state is in harmony with the external manifestations of feelings and emotions. People who perceive themselves realistically easily build relationships with others, react calmly to criticism and are always ready to joke about themselves.

Adequate self-esteem implies a correspondence between a person’s aspirations and the ability to realize these aspirations. The famous toast is “May your desires always coincide with your capabilities!” — well reflects the essence of adequate self-esteem.

Understated

If the assessment of one’s own capabilities is underestimated in relation to their real value, one can speak of low self-esteem. Such a person is not confident in his abilities and shows a strong dependence on the assessment of others. Moreover, he draws conclusions about his capabilities not from the real statements of other people, but from his own conjectures - they probably think about me in such and such a way.

A person with low self-esteem is characterized by increased anxiety, suspiciousness, and inability to make decisions and take responsibility. Such people are often negatively disposed towards others; they see a trick everywhere, an attempt to infringe on their rights.

The other side of low self-esteem is uncertainty, shyness, timidity. An intelligent, talented, worthy person in all respects, to whom parents or other people - teachers, managers, spouses - have instilled the idea of ​​his supposed inferiority, can also suffer from low self-esteem.

Overpriced

Inflated self-esteem is not a purely negative quality until a high opinion of oneself begins to interfere with the adequate perception of such a person by others. If a person with high self-esteem has real superiority, for example, solves problems better than anyone or runs the fastest, those around him will forgive his arrogance for the time being.

More often it happens differently: a person with high self-esteem looks down on others, without having any reason for this. He considers all his actions and thoughts to be the only correct ones, and in case of failure, he blames circumstances or other people.

Hand in hand with high self-esteem go arrogance, arrogance, swagger, disrespect for other people's opinions, and sometimes aggressiveness and cruelty. Such people cannot stand criticism; it is impossible to convince them, to force them to look at what is happening from the other side. All these qualities repel people and create a social vacuum around an inadequate personality.

You should understand the difference between high and inflated self-esteem. High is based on real merits and achievements, inflated indicates a false self-perception


Brief description of levels

The main character traits of a person who has adequate self-esteem:

  • a realistic view of yourself and your achievements;
  • critical assessment of one's capabilities;
  • setting goals that can be achieved;
  • state of harmony;
  • self-confidence and self-confidence;
  • realizing your talents and abilities;
  • goodwill, but at the same time the ability to say “no” in the right situation;
  • the ability to admit your mistakes and correct them;
  • self-discipline;
  • constant self-development.

Such people, as a rule, have stable career growth, good family relationships, a circle of friends, and respect from others.

When the level is too high, the following are observed:

  • unshakable confidence in one’s own rightness;
  • imposing your opinion on everyone around you;
  • intransigence in disputes, inability to lose;
  • failure to admit one's mistakes;
  • constant competition with everyone;
  • placing blame and responsibility for failures on others;
  • denial of one's own shortcomings;
  • selfishness.

People with such a character can achieve career heights, but become despot bosses. In family life, these are despot husbands and bitch wives. They rarely make friends. People around them try to avoid them.

A low level is characterized by:

  • constant self-criticism;
  • dissatisfaction with one’s own behavior, actions, and whole life;
  • resentment towards any criticism;
  • indecision;
  • fear of mistakes;
  • dependence on other people's opinions;
  • the desire to please everyone;
  • inability to say “no”;
  • a constant feeling of guilt, which over time becomes neurotic;
  • pessimism;
  • envy of the achievements and successes of other people;
  • prone to rumors and gossip.

Such people rarely achieve professional heights. These are uninitiative gray mice, which, however, can cope well with routine work. In the family, these are henpecked husbands who take care of children and housework, and humble wives who indulge their husbands in everything. If there are friends, then they are the same as them. Relationships with others do not go well, since they are most often outcasts in society.

Self-esteem structure

The concept of self-esteem can be conditionally divided into two components: cognitive or cognitive, and emotional, built on a person’s experience of ideas about himself. In other words, self-esteem consists of a set of qualities that a person possesses and his attitude towards these qualities.

To these components we can add a third component - the behavioral component, which is the link between the internal assessment of oneself and how society evaluates the individual. Thus, self-esteem consists of three interrelated parts:

a person’s idea of ​​his abilities, appearance, character, place in society, his own attitude towards these ideas, building relationships with others based on these ideas

In total, these three components give the concept of “self”, or “I-concept” - a term common in foreign psychology. The core of the “I-concept” is the emotional component, which is responsible for the degree of self-esteem, the balance between the level of a person’s aspirations and his real achievements.

Sources of formation ↑

Self-awareness and self-esteem arise, form and develop in childhood, during the formation of personality (this actively manifests itself after approximately 3 years).

The child slowly begins to understand his abilities (mental and other), motives and behavioral manifestations, goals, physical and spiritual capabilities, relationships with others.

The formation of self-esteem occurs in the process of knowing oneself. The attitude towards one’s own “I” is not created immediately, but gradually: step by step, each individual acquires a familiar view of himself, approving or disapproving of certain manifestations, actions, thoughts, relationships, results, etc. The value and significance of one’s own personality develops into a strong belief.

The sources of self-esteem through which it is directly formed are:

  1. Self image . It is created by comparing the components of the individual’s “I” - real and ideal (a comparison between what a person is now in his perception and what he would like to become in order to change for the better).
  2. Mathematically, this is determined through the magnitude of the difference between a person’s claims and his actual results and achievements. The larger this gap, the lower the person’s level of self-esteem, and vice versa.
  3. The transition of an individual’s external assessments (from the social environment) into an internal assessment of himself is internalization. Each individual tends to base his assessment of himself on how, in his perception, he is assessed by other people.
  4. Assessing the success of your own results . Here, self-esteem manifests itself in a person’s consciousness through the level of achievements and their evaluation: the individual is satisfied/dissatisfied with what has been achieved, the quality of the results - this is the measure of the value of the given score on the positive-negative rating scale.
  5. Comparison with significant others . The assessment guidelines are set by authoritative and important people for the individual. Such assessments of others may be subjective, but they serve as the basis for creating ideals and standards to which a person strives.

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Functions

The ability for self-esteem and the need to evaluate one’s qualities is inherent in human nature. The absence of this ability makes it difficult to exist in society and makes it impossible to adequately perceive the world and oneself in this world.

The following main functions of self-esteem can be identified:

regulatory protective reflective developmental emotional

The regulatory function helps to make a decision, to make a choice. With the help of this function, a person decides how to behave in a given situation - to do or not to do, to agree or refuse.

The protective function is characteristic of adequate and inflated self-esteem. In case of failure or unforeseen circumstances, it allows you to survive the situation without serious losses, does not allow you to give up and lose faith in yourself. This function does not work for people with low self-esteem.

The reflective function reflects a person’s attitude towards himself. It realistically shows how an individual relates to his actions and promotes an adequate assessment of his own actions.

The developmental function does not allow you to stop there. It stimulates constant self-development, personal growth, and encourages the idea of ​​the need to acquire new knowledge and skills.

Emotional function occupies a special place. It is she who is responsible for the degree of satisfaction with her own qualities, allows her to feel adequate and comfortable.

In addition to those listed, some other functions of self-esteem can be identified - adaptive, helping to adapt to external circumstances; corrective, performing control functions in the process of life; terminal, forcing you to stop actions if they develop undesirably, and some others.

Self-esteem of personality

A person’s self-esteem influences his attitude towards himself; it is how he evaluates his capabilities, strengths and skills. It is the center of personality development and has a huge impact on a person’s adaptation to a new society or group. This is not a constant - it develops and changes depending on the events occurring in a person’s life. Basically, self-awareness and self-esteem are ingrained in a person from childhood and gradually develop into the self-concept. Its presence is present in any behavioral act of an individual. How a person will behave in a critical situation, how he will resolve important issues, and whether he will decide to complete certain tasks will directly depend on the person’s level of self-esteem at the time of making the decision.

3 types of self-esteem in psychology

Self-esteem is divided into three types: underestimated, overestimated and average (adequate). People with different levels of self-esteem will behave differently in the same situation.


Low self-esteem is the result of an incorrect, perhaps domineering or overprotective upbringing. Such upbringing leads to lack of confidence in oneself and one’s strengths and, as a consequence, to a low assessment of oneself. People with low self-esteem are very vulnerable and often withdrawn, not sociable, and lack initiative. This behavior leads to an inferiority complex and the development of depressive states. As a rule, such people tend to belittle their role in society, trying in no way to stand out. The clients of modern psychologists are increasingly people with low self-esteem. This problem can and should be solved. You can work on it.

A high self-evaluation


Inflated self-esteem of a person is evidenced by a person’s reluctance to look at his mistakes, analyze them and admit them. A person with high self-esteem tends to idealize himself and exaggerate his importance to those around him. Such people are characterized by dominant feelings and self-demonstration. Sometimes it can be difficult for a person to live with high self-esteem. Understanding and realizing this will be the first step towards correcting the situation, i.e. you can make your self-esteem adequate. But in general, this type of self-esteem gives the individual self-confidence, which is a good driving force. Such people live under the motto “I can”, “I can”, “I want”. They are dominated by qualities such as perseverance and desire.


People with adequate self-esteem realistically assess their strengths and capabilities in relation to the task in front of them. Such individuals set clear goals that they achieve and look at things soberly. Also, adequate self-esteem indicates the maturity of the individual. The more mature a person is, the more adequate his self-esteem is.

Conclusion

The kind of self-esteem of an individual formed at the end of development will influence the level and quality of life of the individual in society. Being aware of himself, understanding and accepting in a certain way, a person makes life plans, creates his environment and lives in this world. Being an important link in the development of individuality, a person’s self-esteem determines the level of self-confidence and satisfaction with one’s life.

The process of forming self-esteem

The formation of self-esteem occurs throughout the entire period of personality development. This process begins from the moment of birth and reaches its culmination in the preschool and school years.

There is reason to believe that self-esteem begins to form already during the period of intrauterine development. The following facts have an impact: whether the child is desired or not, the parents have high hopes for the heir or perceive the birth of the child as a current event in their life.

Self-esteem is formed on the basis of the child’s interaction with the world around him. The first people a baby encounters are his parents, brothers and sisters, and other relatives. Then it’s the turn of kindergarten teachers and teachers. The nature of how others evaluate a child’s behavior and abilities in the first five years of life leaves an imprint on his entire future life.

Respectful attitude on the part of parents, high assessment of abilities, well-deserved praise, support for initiative form adequate or increased self-esteem in the child.

If a child from an early age is taught to think that he can’t do anything, that he does everything worse than his peers, if he is not given the opportunity to show independence, imagination, and initiative, the result is that he grows up to be an insecure, complex loser with low self-esteem. Experienced teachers or talented coaches and mentors will be very lucky in this case.

At school age, there is an opportunity to correct and raise self-esteem by identifying and stimulating abilities for creativity, science, and sports. If the moment for the formation of general high self-esteem is missed, there is a chance to raise private self-esteem, to teach you to evaluate yourself higher in one area.

Creating ideal self-esteem


Any parents want their child to achieve some heights in life, either those that he himself will look at, or those that loving parents will show him. Therefore, it is important to cultivate ideal self-esteem in a person. It must be adequate, high and stable.

To do this, the child needs to be explained from an early age that he is no better than other people until he himself achieves certain successes in life. It is also worth instilling in the child faith in his own abilities, always repeating that he can do this or that thing. Support him in his own endeavors.

And you should also remember that in order to raise a child, you must have mutual respect in your family. Do not humiliate your child under any circumstances, even unknowingly. A trusting relationship with a child will become the trigger that will launch the reaction of building a correct outlook on life and ideal self-esteem.

Factors influencing the formation of self-esteem

At an early age, the formation of self-esteem is influenced by the people with whom the child encounters most often - parents, older brothers and sisters, grandparents. Self-esteem is not born on its own, “out of nowhere.” The habit of evaluating oneself develops gradually, under the influence of the assessments that people around us give us.

With age, the proportion of various factors changes. If for a small child the first place is the assessment of his actions by his parents, then for a schoolchild the priorities shift towards the assessment of teachers and peers. An approximate list of factors influencing the self-esteem of a primary school student is as follows:

assessment by a teacher, mentor, coach opinion of parents, relatives opinion of fellow students, hobbies personal experience, sense of competence influence of reflection

After a child enters school, the formation of self-esteem rapidly gains momentum. An internal reassessment of values ​​occurs: a spoiled child receives critical comments from the teacher, is subjected to ridicule by peers, and faces his first failures in the learning process. This can lead to low self-esteem, nervous breakdowns, and reluctance to go to school. And vice versa - those qualities that were previously scolded by parents turn out to be in demand and are recognized by classmates, which helps to increase self-esteem.

How self-esteem is formed

Building self-esteem is a process of separating it from parental figures. Becoming independent.

Initially, the child has no self-esteem. She appears in the process of separation from her mother. First, the child separates physically - it ceases to depend so much on mother's milk and warmth. Afterwards, a personality is gradually formed, the main character traits become expressed - he is already separated on a personal level. At this moment, self-esteem arises.

She is still dependent on the parents, on how they evaluate the child. Afterwards, this dependence can be transferred to peers, teachers, and other significant people. Until a person becomes independent, he will be influenced by public opinion.

Many people, based on popular psychology, believe that self-esteem depends on how high or low their parents rated them as children. The connection between parental assessment and self-esteem exists as long as the personality is dependent. If a person evaluates himself independently, then there is not much difference whether he was praised or scolded in childhood.

A child's self-esteem is formed based on the parents' attitude towards him. An adult's self-esteem must be independent.

The factors influencing the formation of self-esteem are also not so clear. People who were praised a lot by their parents in childhood often find it more difficult to develop independent self-esteem. Why, we are given delicious food here too. Socialization of such people is more difficult. Because society treats them worse than their parents. You don’t want to leave your cozy home nest to go to school or work, where everyone is angry and no one treats a person like a little gem. There are plenty of such nuggets there even without him.

Therefore, for future life, overestimating self-esteem is even more harmful than underestimating it. Well, better - the golden mean.

Women's self-esteem is more often dependent. Because our culture does not condemn a woman's dependence. Men are taught from childhood to be independent and rely on themselves. They are not touched by their weakness. And therefore, on average, it is a little easier for them to work with self-esteem.

When self-esteem is formed , a person stops worrying about what others will think of him. He notices external assessments, takes them into account, remembers the presence of his strengths and weaknesses, but they do not cause concern.

For some, self-esteem remains dependent. A person without self-esteem does not want to evaluate himself. He wants to be appreciated by others. So he begs in her absence, greedy and hungry for the praise of others.

Internal locus of control, high self-esteem, and the desire to rely on oneself are factors influencing the formation of independent self-esteem.

People often think that they lack the confidence to have high self-esteem. But it's the other way around. First you need to unhook your self-esteem, and then confidence will appear. Stop relying on people's opinions to evaluate yourself. Only your own supports give you a sense of stability. Otherwise it will continue to wobble. Even if others assure you that you are great, you will still have doubts.

When criticism from authoritative people stops unsettling and causing discomfort, then self-esteem will become independent.

Diagnostics

One of the qualities that characterizes an adult, self-sufficient person is the ability to correctly assess one’s capabilities and abilities, and to separate one’s own assessment from the opinions of others. How objective a person is in this assessment can be determined using various methods and methods for diagnosing self-esteem.

Diagnosis of a person’s assessment of his skills, qualities, and character traits lies in the sphere of competence of specialists - psychologists, psychotherapists, teachers. Analyzing various types of self-esteem, psychologists came to the conclusion that it can be optimal and suboptimal, or, in other words, adequate and inadequate.

In order to correctly diagnose self-esteem, specialist consultation, the use of scientific methods and various testing methods are necessary.

Optimal self-esteem is expressed in the fact that a person treats himself with a healthy amount of criticism, assessing himself realistically. With such self-esteem, an individual is able to notice the pros and cons in himself, sees his successes and notes failures, sets realistic goals for himself and is able to correct his behavior. A person adequately evaluates himself and tries to imagine what his actions look like from the outside. The internal state of such a person is characterized by harmony and stability.

Suboptimal self-esteem means excessively high or, conversely, low self-esteem. People with inadequate self-esteem either idealize themselves or unreasonably belittle themselves. Such people do not perceive any comments from the outside, or interpret them to suit their own opinion. A fair reproach or request to reconsider one’s attitude is perceived as an attempt to humiliate or insult one’s dignity. Such a person, even if he cannot deny an obvious mistake, writes it off due to the nagging or envy of others.

How to increase self-esteem

It’s good if the child’s parents, who have discovered signs of low self-esteem in him, are concerned about this issue. To do this, you don’t need to be a professional psychologist, just watch how the baby reacts to adults’ comments. Confusion and tears in the eyes indicate low self-esteem. If a child tries to defend his opinion, to do it his own way, this is a good sign. The child’s attempts to provide a logical basis for his actions, for example, to say that this is more convenient or easier for him, indicate good, adequate self-esteem.

When a child begins to attend kindergarten or school, his self-esteem can take a serious hit. Accustomed to parental praise for every trifling achievement, he finds it difficult to tolerate criticism from elders or ridicule from peers. The task of parents at this stage is to support the child, analyze the situation, and give wise advice. If a student is not good at exact sciences, he needs to find subjects that arouse the greatest interest. It is quite possible that failing in math will not prevent a child from becoming a talented biologist or writer.

Expressed self-esteem is fully formed in a child by the age of 5. Raising the level of self-esteem to a sufficient level is an important task for parents and teachers of child care institutions

Low self-esteem can also be raised in an adult. This is more difficult to do than in childhood, because you will have to completely reshape the formed attitude towards yourself. In childhood, this attitude is formed based on the assessments of other people. This means that now we need to find people who will help us go through the entire path of developing self-esteem again.

Such a person can be a professional psychologist or a specialist who practices methods of increasing self-esteem. Good results will come from attending webinars, working in a group of like-minded people, and independently studying relevant literature.

There are several simple but effective ways to increase self-esteem:

Use self-hypnosis formulas, periodically mentally or out loud say the phrases: “I can do this. I will definitely succeed,” or: “It’s not the gods who burn the pots. I will succeed too!” Determine your areas of expertise. It’s impossible to be perfect in everything - if you suffer from comparing yourself to a beautiful and slender friend, talk more often about what delicious pancakes and pies you can cook.

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