How to survive your husband's betrayal and learn to live again

In this article we will tell you:

1. You can’t drive away forgiveness: a psychologist’s opinion on betrayal
2. What to do if a woman finds it difficult to cope with the betrayal of her beloved husband
3. Advice from a psychologist to survive your husband's betrayal
4. Betrayal by husband during pregnancy
5. Betrayal by your husband at 50: how to survive and forgive
6. 4 mistakes that will not help you survive your husband’s infidelity and betrayal

How to survive your husband's betrayal if trust is lost? Relationships are built on love, but the foundation of marriage is trust. And when a man betrays, in essence, this act undermines family foundations. Everything that previously seemed so strong and unshakable suddenly turns into rubble.

A woman can no longer trust her husband. Every careless glance, every business trip, every meeting with friends acquires a subtext in which the stain of betrayal is seen. And even if the adultery was isolated, the former trust in the man is no longer there.

However, many women still find the strength to survive betrayal. For the sake of the family, for the sake of the children... So is it worth continuing to live with a traitor?

You can’t drive away forgiveness: a psychologist’s opinion on betrayal

Is it possible to forget about the betrayal of a loved one and forgive him? Psychologists answer this question differently; this is influenced by the circumstances and the attitude of the spouse to the current situation.

Experts in this controversial situation believe that adultery can be forgiven in the following cases:

• The betrayal occurred accidentally or one-time. The spouse was away from home for a long time (for example, on a business trip), the situation was provoked by drinking alcohol at some event.
• The spouse's repentance is obvious and appears to be true. He is trying to make amends.
• You have children together. A minor child usually experiences a divorce painfully, and his psyche may be disturbed. But constant quarrels provoked by jealousy are also a danger for children.
• Cheating occurred due to jealousy or a desire to take revenge on a partner.

The process of dealing with grief due to betrayal includes 5 stages

1. Stage of denial and shock. A person simply cannot believe what happened, especially if the betrayal is unexpected. Reaction: emotional excitement, or vice versa, emotional coldness, inhibition.
2. The stage of aggression, the experience of resentment, anger.
   Often aggression and anger are directed at the person who cheated, who left, who “abandoned”, or left their loved ones.
3. Stage of guilt.
   The person blames himself for what happened, his “bad behavior.” A person may also experience remorse for treating the person who cheated poorly and paying little attention to him.
4. Stage of depression
   . Depression, apathy, irritability, decreased social activity - all these are manifestations of depression. Life can lose all meaning; a person tends to “drown out” his pain with alcohol and other “antidepressants.”
5. Acceptance stage.
   No matter how hard a person experiences betrayal, acceptance of the loss gradually sets in. This stage is characterized by the restoration of the usual course of life, once again falling into its groove. Life acquires purpose and meaning.

Cheating is a difficult situation, a crisis for a couple. It is very painful for both partners and has a strong impact on future relationships. The behavior of both the man and the woman after such a situation arises determines whether they can continue to exist as a couple.

First, you need to figure out what the reason for the betrayal is. Psychologists

the following is said about betrayal: the reason for betrayal often lies in a person’s hidden complexes, which he tries to compensate for in this way. A woman or man, due to lack of self-confidence, strives to prove to herself and others that it costs nothing for her (him) to conquer someone else’s heart, and it is easy to play with the feelings of others. Ultimately, such actions, stemming from complexes, do not bring anything good.

In some cases, a husband or wife, observing a change in family relationships, seeks to get the missing emotions on the side. This does not always mean that he or she has stopped loving their partner. But the human soul wants to receive certain emotions, it cannot live without them, and if there are not enough such impressions, it will simply begin to suffocate. The best way out in this case, of course, is not treason, but resolving the unpleasant situation with the rightful half. Either a separation or a change in family behavior. But not everyone has the courage or willpower to do this. The result is obvious.

It is worth mentioning the case when a person seeks to return the seemingly cooled interest of a partner, making him jealous, and at the same time crosses boundaries. He did this supposedly for love. But can it be perceived that way? Betrayal is always perceived as a blow, like a knife in the back...

But you have to get over it. The main thing is to approach this unpleasant situation wisely.

Advice from psychologists will help you cope with a difficult situation in your family. Experts will show you the best way to get out of trouble. This problem is not uncommon, unfortunately. And psychology has accumulated considerable experience in resolving family conflicts.

It has long been known that women and men perceive the world from different points of view. The former are more emotional, their thoughts pass through the prism of feelings and experiences. The latter think in logical categories. And betrayal, although equally painful for both, is perceived on their part a little differently.

If the husband cheated, the wife most often experiences it very violently - through screams, through tears. And the culprit doesn’t even always observe them - a woman may seem cold and quite calmly put her suitcase on the staircase, but a hurricane will rage inside her, which will certainly spill out.

Psychological assistance when your husband cheats, which can be provided by a specialist, can save you from committing rash acts. A psychotherapist will help you find the reasons that forced the man to take this step. But the reason that a woman manages to instantly come up with for herself often turns out to be even more painful than the fact of betrayal itself. The psychologist will tell you in which direction you should move forward: should you try to save the relationship, forgive your unfaithful loved one, or is it better to forget about him and start a new life.

But it’s not just men who cheat. And for the husband this is no less a strong blow than for the wife in the event of her husband’s betrayal. The bad news is that men, unlike most women, often seek solace in external factors such as alcohol and available women. Psychological assistance when your wife is cheating will help you avoid such ways of solving the problem, maintain composure and health.

By following the advice of a psychologist when your wife cheats, it will be much easier for you to survive this event, return the lost peace to your family, or give your beloved freedom.

And if your wife cheated on you, do not hesitate to contact a person who specializes in human conflicts - he will help you.

The psychotherapist will tell you how best to perceive this situation, how to forgive the unfaithful half. After all, resentment, regardless of the final result, will prevent both parties from living peacefully. The psychologist will give advice on how to behave so that this event does not spoil your future attitude towards life. It will help you objectively assess the reason for the betrayal, and understand what to do next: accept your husband or wife back into the family, learning to trust again, or let go, allowing you to live your life.

Treason

- This is one of the most difficult and unpleasant moments in family life. The betrayal of a loved one is always very painful and subjective and is perceived as a betrayal. As a rule, the life of a family after betrayal changes quite dramatically and not for the better. As a rule, betrayal does not occur out of nowhere. Any betrayal has a reason that lies in the couple's relationship. As practice shows, responsibility for betrayal lies with both spouses. When talking about adultery, it is very important to separate the concepts of “infidelity” and “casual affairs on the side.”

Casual relationships can occur in both men and women, even in the most friendly families. If the couple is healthy enough from a psychological point of view, then, as a rule, the partners overcome this crisis through joint efforts and discussion. Cheating is another matter - when, in addition to sexual relations, some kind of mental or psychological connection is formed on the side. As a rule, it is impossible to conceal betrayal because... after it, family relationships change a lot. Often, betrayal serves as an alarming signal that not all is well in the family and there are problems that require attention and joint discussion. This is quite clearly seen from psychological practice. If partners are ready to discuss what is happening in their relationship, then it turns out that hidden conflicts and tension in the family existed much earlier. For example, a wife is offended by her husband because he does not meet her expectations, does not spoil her the way her father spoiled her in childhood, but expects support and understanding from her for himself. Instead of discussing this among themselves, the wife begins to be cold and distant. The husband gets angry at this and also turns away from his wife. Betrayal occurs, an affair begins on the side. After some time, the wife finds out about the betrayal. As a rule, it is the cheating husband himself who lets slip or leaves traces. It’s like a kind of message: “We have a problem, I don’t have enough warmth and love, I’m ready to leave, but I’m not leaving, because there is something that connects us!” And here it is very important to correctly decipher such a message. Here is just one of the possible options. Every married couple is unique, and every situation has its own reasons and meanings for betrayal.

Each couple, with the help of a psychologist, finds their own way out of this crisis. When marital psychotherapy is successful and the partners are ready for constructive dialogue, then after a correctly experienced betrayal, their relationship improves significantly and a new, deeper understanding of what is happening between them arises. Many survivors of a loved one’s betrayal believe that they can only change something and improve relationships by jointly turning to a psychologist. Actually this is not true. You can seek psychological help alone. Individual psychotherapy will help you cope with your emotional state, understand the reasons for what is happening and develop an optimal behavior strategy for yourself. Often a person experiencing betrayal says that he understands everything, sees the reasons, knows how to behave and can cope with it. If at the same time he feels calm and is open to dialogue, then most likely this is so. But if he has constant anxiety, sleep and appetite are disturbed, then, as a rule, his “understanding” and vision of the situation turns out to be either false or very superficial. It does not reflect the essence of what is happening in their relationship. Therefore, in such cases, it is very important not to delay contacting a psychologist. Sometimes what prevents us from seeking help from a psychologist in time is shame, fear of opening up, fear of changing something, a feeling of mistrust, a feeling of hopelessness. These are the feelings that make us suffer and, therefore, continue to destroy those relationships that still remain after the betrayal. A psychologist will help you understand the situation, resolve those unconscious conflicts that have accumulated in relationships and cope with the emotional tension that arises in this situation.

A marriage built on love is a powder keg for every woman, especially if her feelings are genuine and her whole life with plans for the future is built around only one person. Moreover, if we talk about the modernity of our society, the word “husband” is often associated not only with feelings, but also with the material dependence of a woman. Being overly emotional people, women tend to distort everyday facts in a pathetic, lyrical direction, forming in their heads exactly the fairy tale that they would like to see. Moreover, mentally coloring their relationship with their husband, they build a powerful fundamental psychological basis for this, in which they believe more than trivial physiology. Therefore, when talking about betrayal, it is necessary to clearly imagine the picture in the eyes of a woman who has fallen under the locomotive of real life. Everything around her is falling apart. The stable expression “the world has disappeared from under our feet” is precisely connected with the foundation that they build for themselves. The mistake is that the result is not a foundation, but a minefield.

Not everyone can survive betrayal on their own. In percentage terms, only about 35% of women manage to save their family and themselves in this marriage. About 30% file for a peremptory divorce and see it through to completion. The least emotional people, 25% of them, experience the situation on their own, within themselves, but at the same time remain in the marriage as if nothing had happened. However, their family life cannot be called happy in the future. Such patient “love” is doomed to failure. There is still 10% left. This is the most vulnerable category of women for whom psychological trauma received from infidelity or divorce can lead to irreparable emotional disorders, depression and even suicide. Without professional help, they drown in their own experiences and hysterics, so the help of a psychologist in case of betrayal can be very significant.

No matter what level a woman’s emotional maturity is, betrayal leaves scars forever. From a psychological point of view, betrayal is akin to breaking a leg or arm. Therefore, the help of a psychologist is a necessary step in restoring mental balance and vitality. The task of a professional is not only to treat the soul, but also to work with a woman as an independent person. Professional psychologist

will not write out a prescription with advice on “what to do and how.” First of all, he will arrange for his client to meet with herself. It will restore lost independence from circumstances and events, help to form healthy self-esteem and motivation in life. Gradually, “betrayal” will fade into the background. Firstly, because you can live with absolutely any past, if you look at it through a convenient prism of rationality. Secondly, experiences associated with deception will imperceptibly dissolve in one’s own desires and aspirations, since the most beloved and necessary person for a woman will be herself.

What to do if a woman finds it difficult to cope with the betrayal of her beloved husband

The range of emotions of a deceived wife who is faced with her husband’s betrayal is enormous. The Holmes-Ray Stress Scale clearly shows that a man's betrayal is on par with the death of a loved one.

After receiving the first shock, a woman goes through 5 stages of accepting the current circumstances:

1. State of shock. A woman who has just found out about cheating does not yet realize that reality is real. She cannot even take direct evidence of adultery seriously.
2. Transaction stage. The woman’s only desire is to return to her past relationship. Such obsession often pushes deceived wives to many rash actions.
3. Manifestation of aggression. The betrayal of a beloved man cannot be experienced without irritation and hostility. Most often, wives remain in a state of extreme aggression for a long time. At this stage, a woman can shout at her husband, accuse him of all wrongdoing, and make a scandal. With this, the spouse throws out all the negativity that came to her when she found out about the betrayal.
4. Grief and despair. After some time, sadness about the love she lost gives way to anger and aggression. This stage is associated with memories of a happy family life in which the homewrecker did not yet exist. Everyday events may not interest a woman; she is too absorbed in grief. At these moments, stories about other people's happiness especially hurt her.
5. Reconciliation stage. Ultimately, a woman must come to terms with her husband’s betrayal and decide how to move on: try to maintain family relationships or break up. At this point, all considerations about the pros and cons become fundamental. After this, constructive dialogues begin with your other half about whether you will be together in the future or not.

Psychologists identify several reasons why a woman finds it difficult to cope with her husband’s betrayal. In addition to his sexual relationship with someone else, we can add to this series:

• wasting family money on a mistress;
• talking about another woman with whom the husband is in love;
• romantic dates and flirting with a homewrecker.

Thus, the waste of time, money, care, attention and love by one of the partners, when the second spouse is not aware of what is happening, can most often be called treason. Such betrayals are not easily forgiven or experienced and, unfortunately, in most cases lead to the couple’s divorce.

The real curses of modernity are pride, lack of respect for one’s soul mate, the inability to improve relationships and the subsequent betrayal of spouses. Unfortunately, there is no magic remedy that could insure a couple against “going to the left.” This is the prerogative of the spouses themselves - they can take the right steps so as not to take the path of infidelity and maintain a happy family relationship.

How to survive your husband's betrayal

Seven tips to help you forgive your husband’s infidelity:

1.Move away. It is not easy. After all, it seems that the sooner you find out the situation, the sooner it will be resolved, but this is not so. The conversation will simply end in a scandal, hysteria, accusations and “caustic” words that will hurt the offender.

Take a break. Calm down. Walk more, throw yourself into work, let off some steam, go on vacation, spend more time with friends. Once you are able to distance yourself from the betrayer, it will be easier to think clearly about the situation and discuss it calmly with your spouse.

2. Don't suppress your feelings. A frank conversation will help you understand the reason for the action and get emotional release. You need to sincerely forgive your partner and accept the betrayal as a fait accompli, otherwise there is no point in saving the family.

Stop making excuses and believing that the relationship will magically become the same as before. It’s better to think whether you are ready to come to terms with the act and forgive.

To better understand the situation, you can contact a family psychologist or read books on this topic, for example:

• “Infidelity”, Marina Travkova;
• "The chemistry of love. A Scientific View of Love, Sex and Attraction”, Brian Alexander, Larry Young;
• "Right to left." Why do people cheat and is it possible to avoid cheating”, Esther Perel;
• “Bed wars. Infidelity, Sexual Conflict and Relationship Evolution by Robin Baker;
• “Why Men Lie and Women Cry,” Allan Pease, Barbara Pease;
• The Science of Love and Cheating by Robin Dunbar.

3. Don't blame yourself. Refuse to play the victim. Analyze your own actions, since two people are responsible for any rift in a relationship. You need to admit part of your wrongness, but without removing responsibility from the man and without self-flagellation. If your partner persistently or even aggressively accuses you, leave immediately.

You can remember the incident, but you don’t need to always remember the whole painful range of feelings, “scroll” in your imagination the details of how your husband gave love to another. There is no need to come up with options for repeated betrayals.

4. There is no need to compare yourself with your rival. Work on improving your self-esteem. Take care of your own appearance: take a manicure and makeup course, join a gym, update your wardrobe, change your image or style. The new image of a “desirable woman” will attract the gaze of the stronger sex and get rid of complexes.

5. Taking care of your own health will help distract you from negative thoughts after cheating. Physical and mental activity: do a thorough cleaning of the apartment, throw away or donate unnecessary things, take part in a city quest, play board games with friends.

6. Find support. Express yourself to your loved ones, chat on the forum with women who have also experienced betrayal. The problem will not seem so acute and painful if you talk about it very often: to your mother, to a friend, to yourself in front of the mirror, to a psychotherapist.

7.Work on improving your relationship. Start over and build a deep connection between you. Find something in common, share and share each other’s interests, watch a TV series together, read the same books. Go on vacation together.

Couples are brought together by their shared hobbies: tennis, cycling, painting by numbers. You can try something new for you: flying in a wind tunnel, rock climbing, hiking, pottery, baking cakes. Learn to compromise. Look for a middle ground in all decisions. Don't let everything always be the way only one of the partners wants.

Advice from a psychologist to survive your husband's betrayal

To begin with, the spouse should not think that the man is solely responsible for what happened. In every conflict, all participants are guilty. If there is no mutual respect and understanding in the family, then discord will definitely happen. It is necessary to evaluate your place in this difficult situation.

For wives who have experienced a stressful state after the news of their husband’s infidelity, we can advise the following:

• Be sure to talk frankly with your spouse, do not put off this unpleasant dialogue. Do not remember past claims and grievances, but pay attention to analyzing the current circumstances.
• Spouses should, without quarreling or swearing, talk about those qualities of each other that cause them the most irritation. They can then speak up and provide a solution to this difficult situation.
• Don’t be too happy when your husband promises to stop all contact with the homewrecker and turn all his attention to his family. If your mistress disappears from your spouse’s life, this does not mean at all that he will not compare you. Often this comparison is not in favor of the spouse.

It is very important how you look at a meeting with your husband if it takes place at a specific time in a designated place. Do not come to a conversation with your spouse with tear-stained eyes and a face swollen from tears. Take care of yourself, you should be graceful, irresistible and confident.

• Don't make a deal with yourself and your conscience, trying to silence the problem and return to your past relationship. But aggression and noisy scandals with breaking dishes will also not bring positive results. Don't try to make your partner feel sorry for you. It is necessary to throw out the negativity later, directing it in a less destructive direction.
• Accept that the emotional wound after your beloved husband’s betrayal will heal for some time. Take a close look at your spiritual, intellectual and physical development, thus driving away melancholy and sadness. Psychologists advise starting to change yourself internally and externally, rather than passively waiting for happy changes in life. Take a break and go on a trip with your best friend if you can afford it. New scenery and impressions will help speed up the time of getting rid of stress.
• If the spouses, after a constructive dialogue, decide to stay together, psychologists advise starting to actively get closer to each other. Take a short vacation from work, take the kids to their grandparents, and go travel. A second honeymoon will intoxicate you with its atmosphere and help you start your relationship from scratch.

Family education

A lot depends on upbringing and family relationships. Sometimes some kind of trauma, a psychological problem rooted deep in childhood, leads to betrayal. Misogynists are prone to adultery, showing in this way their aggression, which lies in the subconscious. Boys spoiled by their mother’s love and considering themselves “God’s gift” are no exception. They are constantly looking for someone who will idolize him as a mother, which they cannot find in real life, no matter how much their wife loves them.

Feeling like the top of a triangle, for the love of which the whole family is fighting each other, the boy in maturity comes to the fight of two women for his “beloved”, only for this he takes a mistress. There will always be such a triangle in his life, even if his wife changes. In this case, the secret makes no sense; he must see the struggle of the rivals.

Mom and son

But even in a large family, when you yourself have to fight off pieces of love, a fighter grows up, for whom in the future defeating his opponent and taking his woman away becomes the main thing in the relationship. Love has nothing to do with it, the main thing is victory.

It would be a big misconception to believe that a mama’s boy or a “henpecked man” is not capable of treason. Having chosen a caring “mommy” as his wife, he eventually begins to look for a sexual partner. He will never leave his wife, which his mistress is often aware of.

Basically, several options are mixed in one man, which led to infidelity. Treason has many faces. If there is no desire or determination to immediately drive the traitor away, then it is necessary to comprehend and try to understand the reason that prompted the partner to cheat. There is always hope to fix everything.

Betrayal by husband during pregnancy

Sometimes couples break up during a woman’s most difficult and responsible period – during her pregnancy. How to survive your husband’s betrayal and betrayal when you are soon to have a child together?

1. First, always remember that you are the only one responsible for your baby.

   Your experiences and stress can negatively affect its intrauterine development and often become the causes of congenital diseases. Minimize your worries, although in a situation with your husband’s betrayal you are not going through the best of times. Your main goal should be to take care of yourself and the health of your child; do not waste energy on scandals and hysterics with your spouse. You need to focus your energy on quickly recovering from the news of betrayal.

2. Secondly, provide your unborn child with everything necessary.

   Your husband is obligated to help you financially after the baby is born.

   When your husband has no problems with adequacy and responsibility, difficulties should not arise. If your spouse promises to help you with a certain amount of money every month, do you need to file for alimony in court? No matter how honest your husband is, his verbal promises will not guarantee payment to you, so think carefully about this issue.

   Sometimes it happens that a spouse’s promises of financial support remain only words, and he does not want to help voluntarily. Therefore, at the very beginning, officially confirm that the husband agrees to transfer a certain amount to support the life of the child. If your spouse refuses to help you on principle, feel free to go to court. In any case, the child’s father is obliged to provide for him until he reaches adulthood.

3. As mentioned above, focus on the positive aspects of your life to help you forget your spouse's betrayal more quickly.

   Waiting for the birth of your baby is the most important and positive aspect of your life today. Prepare a children's room, attend classes for expectant mothers, make new friends there, and you will not have time to be sad and worry.

4. Last of all, force yourself to forgive your unfaithful husband, who committed betrayal at this important time for both of you. Do this, although it will be very difficult for you.

   Try to forgive your spouse not for him, but for yourself. A kind mother who will raise her child correctly is most important in this unpleasant situation. And if you harbor a grudge against your ex-husband, you may encounter difficulties in building new relationships with other men.

What to do when you find out about cheating

• If the news has caused anger and resentment, try to calm down. To do this, you can drink a sedative or give vent to tears by locking yourself in your room.
• Physical exercise is a good way to let off steam. Go to the gym or pool and give yourself maximum exercise. The main thing is to free yourself from hatred and anger, because they will begin to destroy you from the inside, and this will only get worse.
• You don’t need to listen to the advice of friends and acquaintances on how to survive your husband’s betrayal; you have an individual situation that you need to think about on your own.
• To do this, take the children to their grandmothers and leave home for an indefinite period of time, let your husband wonder where you went.
• Live alone for a few days, put your feelings in order and decide how to live further.

You have two options: leave your husband forever or stay and try to forget what happened. Think about whether you are able to forgive your husband and live with him after his betrayal.

To make a decision, it is important to know whether the husband has stumbled once or whether he has a permanent mistress to whom he can leave. If your spouse repents, hangs up the phone and asks you to forgive him, you need to ask yourself: “how to survive betrayal and forgive your husband?”

Betrayal by your husband at 50: how to survive and forgive

If a woman has already been deceived in her first marriage, she will have difficulty becoming happy in future love unions. She will always be afraid of a repetition of the sad events that she had to endure. Another “eternal problem” can be the relationship of the new spouse with children from the first marriage, which does not always go well.

If your family has existed for many years and its disintegration is inevitable, the question of how to survive betrayal and divorce from your husband is especially relevant. Over the past years, a woman can only feel like a part of this particular family; future loneliness frightens her. The consequences of such a break are inevitable, even if you decide to seek help from psychologists.

A man can cheat on his wife even in adulthood, although this will most likely lead to divorce. But even after a thirty-year relationship, you can survive your husband’s betrayal. Feelings and emotions from a breakup in this case go through several stages:

• Lack of confidence in what happened.

The belief that the situation happened to you and your long-term happy union is ending does not come immediately. At first, the woman hopes that her husband will soon realize his mistakes and return to the family. It is especially difficult for women whose children have grown up and are living their own lives during this difficult period. Their loneliness is felt more strongly.

• Loss of interest in life

When understanding the reality of the situation, a woman can be overtaken by real depression. Close people must help and support her in this situation. At this moment, you need to occupy yourself with something, this will distract you from thoughts about your spouse’s betrayal. You can start communicating with new people, take up a hobby or sport - this will give you strength to move on. If a woman does not withdraw into herself, but opens up to something new, then she moves to the next step.

• Increasing attention to yourself

Own worries and problems in family life fade into the background. You spend all your energy on work, maintaining your home, and raising children. The concept of woman gives way to wife and mother. There is a great way to cope with a divorce from your husband - to remember that you are beautiful and attractive. There is something else in life besides family responsibilities - these are your own dreams, the time has come to fulfill them.

• The desire to start life from scratch

At 30, it is much easier for a woman to survive her husband’s betrayal and subsequent divorce than at 50. Thirty-year-olds can hope for future happiness, but at 50, the comparison of oneself with an old woman with a broken trough is firmly in the head. After some time, the pain will fade away and life will continue.

There are situations when a woman who has experienced pain and is taking timid steps in a new life encounters her ex-husband, who suddenly decided to admit his mistakes and return to her. Some couples may begin to rebuild relationships, but in a different direction. Some women still decide to find new love or live happily alone.

Reasons for male infidelity

Most men will list several “excuses” to defend their infidelity. The most popular reason is considered to be the replacement of a wife with a young and beautiful nymphet. At a crisis age, when it seems old age is knocking on the door, a man begins to protest and make mistakes.

Many women make the mistake of thinking about replacing them with someone more beautiful and worthy. According to statistics, a man more often leaves for a less attractive girlfriend than his wife. This suggests that external data does not play a role in cheating.

Photo by Vitor Pinto on Unsplash

A woman may not even guess about the true reasons for her partner’s betrayal, but this does not alleviate the pain of the fact itself. It is necessary to “pull yourself together” without pity, without hysterics and swearing at the traitor, to look for the reason for what happened in order to avoid this in the future:

• Incorruptible statistics say that more than 40% of betrayals happen out of revenge. A man can take revenge for a lot of things, for example, for grumpiness or inattention; he knows or thinks that he has been cheated on.
• Second place goes to self-affirmation, especially after a personal failure that affects self-esteem. By cheating, a man receives psychological compensation.
• Another type of men are romantic natures, looking for their soul mate for a happy life. Constantly cheating, they explain everything by bad luck in finding the one and only.
• People who feed on admiration for themselves - “narcissists” - get used to taking because of their “specialness.” For them, the constant fascination with new fans becomes everyday.
• There is a category of “real men” for whom cheating is commonplace and is not considered something serious and important.