The girl doesn't want a relationship? What to do about it? (Spoiler: this is not a verdict)

Why doesn't a girl want a relationship?

A lady may avoid relationships for various reasons. Some of them can be corrected, while others are so serious that it will be extremely difficult to change anything in communication with your beloved.

Reasons why a girl doesn't want a relationship:

#1 She recently broke up with her boyfriend, and the breakup was hard for her. After a long time of unfreedom and a showdown, she will at least want to live for her own pleasure for a while until she is released.

#2 Negative experiences in the family. Mom and Dad are always at loggerheads, or even divorced. Or, for example, her mother raised her and instilled in her that all men are assholes, and it is better to stay away from them. This is a rather difficult category of girls.

#3 She doesn't like you enough. She keeps you as a backup option. It seems to communicate, flirt, give hope, but does not reach a relationship. As soon as another guy appears with whom she falls in love, even the communication that exists will come to naught.

Do all girls want a relationship?

No, not all. All people are different. Everyone has their own life experiences and beliefs. Accordingly, life goals. For example, a girl is going to move to another country after some time. And he doesn’t want anything serious until he leaves. This is understandable: she will leave anyway, and there is no need for unnecessary suffering.

Or another example. She is going through a serious period in her studies or business. She set herself a framework: to put effort into developing her business or study for a year, and not be distracted by anything. This rarely happens. But it happens.

However, often girls simply come up with excuses for why they don’t want a relationship. And such excuses do not intersect with reality. For example, she may say that she is very busy and has no time for a relationship. And the point will simply be that she doesn’t like you enough.

Article on the topic: If a woman doesn’t love a man - 5 signs

The girl doesn't want a relationship, but won't let go

This is exactly the 100% case when she keeps you in reserve. Ladies love to attract many men to themselves and take advantage of them whenever possible. The more there are, the better. If she doesn't love you, but you can provide some service, then she will gladly take advantage of it.

Do you have a car and will you be happy to take her wherever she asks? And you will pick up the drink late at night from your friends. This is exactly the moment when she will give you hope for a relationship because she is comfortable with you. And this pleases her pride. Increases self-esteem.

If you have self-esteem, you will immediately refuse to provide such unreasonable services to a lady.

What a girl says when she doesn't want a relationship:

  • I'm not ready for a serious relationship.
  • I'm afraid of a serious relationship with a guy.
  • I'm not ready for a new relationship.

These are the basic phrases. There may be a thousand more options and other variations of its explanations.

Tips14

Finally, I would like to give some advice. They are not a guarantee that the girl you like will agree to build a relationship with you. These tips will help you get closer to your chosen one and become the right person for her.

  1. If you don’t want to be “her next guy,” take an interest in her affairs as often as possible, ask about her health and how her day went. Read more about how to win a girl here.
  2. Work on yourself. Most likely, you know the ideal of her man, try to get as close to him as possible. This doesn't mean you need to seek help from a plastic surgeon. Change internally. Women value strong character in men; they prefer leaders. When choosing a partner, appearance remains in the background for a girl. Personal qualities are always a priority.
  3. Confess your feelings. Regardless of whether the sympathy between you is mutual, be sure to tell the girl how you feel about her. It’s better to immediately understand whether you have a chance than to indulge yourself with stupid hopes.
  4. If she decides she doesn't want to date you, don't take it personally. This is valuable experience that will definitely be useful to you in the future.

Whether you win the girl you like or not is up to you. Listen to your heart and trust your mind. If you understand for sure that the girl does not want to build a relationship with you, maybe you shouldn’t torture both yourself and her?

Also, read our article about why a man doesn’t want a relationship and what to do about it.

How to woo a woman, a girl who doesn’t want a relationship: advice from a psychologist

Psychologists mainly identify two positions that a girl does not want a relationship: she does not want one with you specifically, but uses just a banal phrase, and she has not yet moved on after the breakup. Also understand that love is not a button in the body that you can press. And most importantly, show feelings, but do not burden the other person. And, moreover, do not demand anything in return.

  • Psychologists also noted that girls prefer confident and strong guys. Therefore, be persistent in achieving your goals, but do not be pushy.
  • Be yourself and don’t hide behind generally accepted masks. Take a closer look at which guys the girl pays attention to. These may be distinctive features in appearance or character. Or maybe a girl is crazy about those who play the guitar. The easy way to fix this is to take lessons from a master.
  • What frustrates women the most is uncertainty. So don't lie! Not saying anything is also not the best quality, so that the weaker sex sometimes already knows the answer to the question posed. It is asked only to see your reaction.


Don't lie and don't scare women with uncertainty

  • Encourage and fulfill your beloved’s wishes, but you don’t need to indulge every whim. Be there at the right time and become just a friend.

Important! You need to let the girl know that she can trust you. This is especially true for those who have experienced a difficult breakup. If you promise to do something, do it at any cost. But don't expect gratitude in return. Everything should be from the heart and without self-interest.

  • Also, a connection was established between the eyes of the partners. When a guy often looks into the eyes of his passion, it looks sexy and arouses interest. And if in response you see embarrassment, then “the ice has broken.”
  • Try to touch her more often. Let it be casual contact with your hand or lips, but make slight eye contact.
  • Don't ask for a second chance! There is no need to talk about your feelings and beg for a date. This will only scare away the weaker sex.
  • Listen and be interested in her problems. We all want to be listened to and heard. Do not interrupt; if necessary, ask leading questions. Catch small suggestive phrases that, for example, will help with choosing a gift. But if the girl’s words only irritate you, then accept that she’s not your type either.
  • Women love generous guys. You don’t need to throw away mountains of wealth, but don’t skimp on nice little things.


Don't be stingy when winning a woman

  • Pay special attention to compliments. But don't use trite phrases. Observe her behavior and note her strengths, which deserve praise.
  • Girls love a sense of humor. There must also be a golden mean in this matter. If you joke too much, you will only show yourself as frivolous. Just know how to put a smile on her face, especially when she is in a sad mood.
  • Know how to forgive. You will put an end to any relationship if you are too demanding and stubborn. No one is immune from mistakes, so be gentle and loyal.
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