How to make a boyfriend, husband, lover jealous? How to make a man jealous: psychology. How to make someone jealous from a distance?


Should you be made jealous?

When asked how to make a man jealous, psychology provides many different ideas. But don't forget that trying to cause jealousy is manipulation. In some cases, it may simply not work or lead to the opposite effect. Before you take decisive action, consider whether you really want to cause jealousy.

Should you make your husband or boyfriend jealous?

In any relationship there comes a crisis. When a woman notices that her lover has stopped complimenting her, doesn’t find time for leisure time together, and simply doesn’t pay attention to her, she looks for ways to bring passion back into the relationship. Causing jealousy is one of the popular ways. However, you may encounter the following problems:

  • A man simply won’t notice your attempts. Most likely, the lack of response will be extremely unpleasant for you. If a man is not jealous when there is a reason for it, the most obvious conclusion is that he is not interested in you. However, there may be other reasons - for example, the man is not jealous in principle, or he saw through your idea. In any case, a lack of response from a man often leads to negative emotions. In addition, in trying to make such a man jealous, you may get carried away and go too far. In this case, such manipulation can even lead to a break in the relationship.

  • There is a type of man who just likes to feel jealous. They are interested in winning an unapproachable woman. If they notice that you are just playing, but in fact have feelings for them, such a relationship will lose meaning for them.
  • Your attempts to make him jealous may just make the man angry. This is especially likely if you flirt with others or start talking a lot with your husband or boyfriend about your exes. Subtle attempts to arouse jealousy, such as hanging out with male friends or wearing sexy outfits, may simply not be noticed by a man if he is confident in himself and you have been in a long-term relationship. More serious ways, like flirting and mentioning other men in conversations, can often cause anger.

Any way to cause jealousy is an extreme measure. In most cases, they are not worth going to if you want to save the relationship. Do you really want to manipulate your loved one? Frank conversation can sometimes be much more helpful. If you are not heard, you should think about whether you need this relationship at all.

Should you make your exes jealous?

A woman tries to make her ex jealous in two cases - either she wants to get him back, or she wants to make him regret losing her. The latter option does not bring any practical benefit, although it helps many women get through a difficult breakup and feel desired. If you decide to make your ex jealous, consider the following nuances:

  • If husbands and boyfriends rarely remain calm when a woman tries to arouse jealousy, then in the case of exes this option is very likely. Of course, everything is very individual - a man’s reaction will depend on how strong the relationship you had and how you broke up. However, if your ex really doesn't want a relationship with you anymore and is already caught up in his own love life, be prepared that your attempts to make him jealous won't do any good. It can be very difficult to realize this - especially if you wanted to get your ex back in this way.

  • If your ex notices that you are deliberately trying to make him jealous, he will only once again feel self-affirmation. Although, in some cases, a man may take this as a signal that you really want him back - then you will have a chance to resume communication.
  • Even if you manage to get your ex back through jealousy, consider whether you really want to continue this relationship. Surely you separated for a reason - there was a certain problem, and it may arise again. In addition, jealousy awakens a competitive spirit in a man. If he wanted to come back after seeing you surrounded by male attention, this does not mean that he needs you. Perhaps he just wants to assert himself among other men.
  • If you're just trying to piss off your ex, chances are you're wasting your time. Small hints can certainly help you feel popular and get over the breakup easier. However, spending your time and energy trying to prove something to your ex instead of enjoying life is clearly not worth it.

How to make a married man jealous?


If a married man is “involved” in the role of your lover, the situation here becomes aggravated, because it is you who more often feels such an offensive and painful feeling as jealousy. Surely, you are tired of sharing him with your wife and also want to make your married lover jealous.

  • Down with the usual calls and SMS at the same time and conversations about how you miss you and are looking forward to meeting him.
  • When meeting, become more secretive and mysterious , do not talk about everything that happened to you during the day.
  • Tell us how great and fun you had at your last corporate event or party (male colleagues were present, of course).
  • If you and your lover are planning a meeting after work (study, courses), find a way to come not alone, but to have a handsome male representative show you off . Allegedly, you and this colleague (classmate, classmate) were simply on the same path, and you reached your destination together. Well, you’re a free girl, there’s nothing wrong with that, and his wife is waiting for him at home.

Let him know that in everyday life you are surrounded by interesting, charismatic men . Always look happy, charming and well-groomed.

Flirting with others as a way to make you jealous

the easiest way to make your husband jealous Flirting with other men is perhaps the most popular way to cause jealousy, especially in married couples when the former passion has disappeared from the relationship. It's a rare man who will remain calm if his girlfriend is flirting with someone in front of him. Often, flirting is the first thing girls resort to in a fit of anger because their loved one has stopped paying attention to them. Is this method any good? If you decide to create jealousy through flirting, pay attention to the following:

  • First of all, you should not flirt with your man's friends or close mutual acquaintances. If you go slightly over the line, you will put both yourself and your boyfriend or husband in a negative light. By neglecting your man in front of your friends, you lower his status, and often men cannot forgive their women for this.

  • The ideal implementation of flirting as a way to induce jealousy is short conversations with strangers. While you and your lover are shopping, walking down the street, or otherwise spending time together in public places, you can initiate a couple of short conversations with strangers - usually the reason for such short conversations is everyday issues. When figuring out how to get to the right street or which line is best to stand in, you can make a couple of ambiguous hints that will make your companion wary.
  • How to make your ex jealous? Dating other men is great for making your ex jealous and getting him back. If you are trying to make your boyfriend or husband with whom you are in a relationship jealous, dating other men is, of course, unacceptable.

"My head hurts!"

If you regularly tried to surprise your husband in bed with interesting experiments, seduced you with revealing outfits and demonstrated genuine sexual interest in every possible way, then the man has already formed a certain intimate image of you in his head.

Don’t know how to make your husband jealous in this case? It's simple: change this image.

Become extremely frigid, refuse sex under the pretext of a headache, menstruation, an injured back - or whatever. And at the same time, you don’t need to conquer Hollywood with your facial expressions - a man should see that you, in general, are just coming up with excuses to avoid sex. Usually in such cases, husbands ask close friends for advice, and the latter often make an a priori verdict: “Yes, she has a lover, obviously!” Oh, these drunken men's conversations - they are so stupid if you look at it that way, but sometimes they play into our hands. True, this method is only good if you don’t get too carried away with it. Otherwise, it is quite possible that one fine evening you will be denied intimacy - and the likelihood that your husband’s very real mistress is to blame for this is very high.

Alexey Petrovich Salimyanov, sexologist, professor at Samara State Medical University:

- Playing hard-to-get with your man can do a disservice in the end, as it directly affects the formation of male self-esteem. If you ignore your partner sexually, you risk provoking erectile dysfunction in him based solely on his lack of confidence in his sexual attractiveness. The likelihood of this greatly increases if a man has already experienced similar problems before.

Talking about exes as a way to cause jealousy

How to make your lover jealous? If you want to make a guy jealous by mentioning other men, this should be done very carefully and indirectly. In fact, you can talk not only about exes—mutual acquaintances or even famous media figures are also suitable.

  • Mentioning the virtues of other men should be done casually or in a joking manner. Also, don't do it too deliberately. Instead of feeling slightly jealous, a man may see through your plan. If he didn’t guess, he may be seriously offended by too frank hints - you shouldn’t deliberately lower the self-esteem of your loved one.
  • This method will not work on a regular basis. You can mention another man in a conversation so that it sounds natural and does not hurt a man’s pride too much once or twice. If you need to fuel jealousy on an ongoing basis, you should adopt some other method.

  • When mentioning the advantages of other men, try to limit yourself to general phrases and not try to deliberately hurt the vulnerabilities of your husband or boyfriend. If you are in a relationship, you probably know about his possible complexes, fears and doubts. You shouldn't manipulate this.

How to make your lover jealous?


Relationships with a lover are all the more complicated because they are not clearly defined. If you have agreed in advance on an open intimate relationship, but deep down you want to transform your union into love, try to make your bed partner jealous.

  1. From time to time, refuse meetings, citing being busy, but do it gently, being in a good mood.
  2. If you feel like smiling at a stranger or a man who gives you an admiring look, do it. Let your lover understand that although you love and respect him, he is not alone in the Universe, and until your relationship is transferred to the category of “official”, he has something to fear for.
  3. Your lover must understand that your life, in addition to your bed dates with him, is filled with a lot of interesting events, activities, dialogues that give you no less pleasure than meeting him.

Male friends as a way to cause jealousy

The easiest way to cause jealousy is to surround yourself with male attention. To do this, it is not necessary to date someone or even flirt, it is enough to find yourself a few male friends. Psychologists still do not have a consensus on the question of whether friendship exists between a man and a woman. One way or another, your husband, boyfriend or ex will perceive other men as potential rivals. If you choose this method, it is worth considering the following points:

  • Male friends can be chosen from mutual acquaintances or from your own acquaintances, just so that your man is aware of their presence. You don’t even have to flirt or make any hints - male attention to you in itself can cause jealousy on the part of your lover.
  • It's good if you and your male friends have common interests and topics of conversation that your boyfriend cannot support. This point is especially relevant if you are meeting in a company. If you engage in dialogues with other men that your boyfriend or husband cannot participate in, this will most likely make him jealous. However, you need to know when to stop - if you use this method too often, your man may get really angry or offended, which will lead to even more problems in the relationship. Try to ignore your man in this way only in the most extreme cases.

  • In fact, having male friends is very beneficial. In the process of communicating with them, you will be able to better understand male psychology. Also, if you find a close friend, he will always be able to give good advice on how to behave in a relationship.

If you decide to implement this method of causing jealousy, it is important to maintain a balance: on the one hand, your goal is to attract the attention of your man, on the other hand, try to choose friends who you really like and with whom you want to maintain relationships. Often people feel like they are simply being used and nothing good will come of this scenario.

How to make a friend jealous?


Sometimes you need to do this, especially when you want to check if your friend is okay with converting a friendship into a romantic relationship. So, to make a friend jealous:

  • show that there are guys around you, men who are interested in you not as a girlfriend, but as a woman, and they show you signs of attention;
  • make it clear that you are absolutely not against innocent flirting with potential admirers, because you are a free girl who is not dependent on relationships;
  • tell a friend about a real or fictitious fan who has been seeking reciprocity for a long time, you can even pluck up the nerve and ask your friend for advice, at the same time check whether he is satisfied with the status of a friend, or whether he is aiming for a higher “position”?

Understatement as a way to cause jealousy

Not always answering calls, staying late at work, texting from your phone or laptop, and laughing it off when your husband has questions is a sure-fire way to cause jealousy. What a person comes up with on his own often turns out to be much more colorful than what he might encounter in real life. The unknown will help keep a man in constant tension. If you were looking for a way to make a guy jealous without doing anything about it, you will like this option.

  • Having chosen this method, you should act gradually. If one day you stop answering calls, stay late for dinner and spend the entire evening texting, this will most likely cause immediate indignation in a man and subsequent unpleasant conversations. To maintain jealousy, all these hints must be ambiguous and infrequent.

  • By missing calls and staying late in the evenings, you can keep a man jealous for quite a long time. For those who were looking for a way to make someone jealous from a distance , this option is suitable. However, do you want to keep your loved one under constant stress? He may remain silent about jealousy, but he will begin to lash out over little things, as a result of which the relationship will only get worse.

Why is jealousy needed?

The edges of jealousy - how to make a guy jealous in order to push him to action

In the process of a “zealous” attack, the moment of getting to know each other is very important. Jealousy really attacks because it cannot be soft and fluffy.


If a girl and a guy barely know each other or don’t know each other at all, then you can make the guy jealous in order to encourage further action, namely, a closer acquaintance. For example, a girl sees that a boy likes him, but for some reason he hesitates to take further action. It is worth showing him that the person he likes can start a relationship that he does not dare to enter into with someone else, if the guy does not take decisive action. Light flirting with a colleague, classmate, or just a guy you know should “stimulate” the young man. The conqueror's instinct will awaken in him. The presence of an opponent always acts as a red rag to the bull.

A completely opposite situation may arise - the young man withdraws into himself, decides that the girl needs someone else, and it is not clear why she paid attention to him. There are two ways to go here:

Throw yourself into the arms of the offended young man, wipe away his angry tears, tell the reasons for your behavior and beg for forgiveness. After this, all doubts are gone - your boyfriend forever.

Another way is to think, why then do you need such a boyfriend, whose girl is taken away, and he dissolves and does nothing to change the situation in his favor.


A completely different option is when young people have known each other for a long time, meet and all, or almost all, “forbidden fruits” have been picked. This situation radically changes things and a spare boyfriend is not exactly what is needed. We can say that this is not at all the option that is needed. In this case, you need to act more sophisticatedly in order to warm up the cooled feelings.

You can try this option: in your mobile, rename your friend Shurochka to Sanya or Sashul, Evgenia to Zhenechka, etc., the main thing is that it is not clear whether the person is feminine or masculine. This method is quite lengthy, but very effective. If a young man is decent enough, then he will not go through his phone and check calls or read SMS, but one day the moment will come when the girl’s phone, lying on the table while she is in the bathroom, will ring, and the young man will definitely see that, in addition to women’s numbers, there are and often men also call. The situation, of course, is acute; it all depends on the young man’s temperament. Cholerics can react very sharply to such a call, and the consequences will be difficult to predict. But sanguine and phlegmatic people can tickle their nerves. Let them sit, think, and maybe even run to the nearest store for a gift. Each person will react differently, but you can be sure that anyone will react!

Any man likes to be admired. But he can’t stand talking about the fact that someone has something better than him. When using this method to make your man jealous, the main thing is not to overdo it. You can admire another man a little, but nothing more. The main thing here is to choose words that will push the young man to take active action: make him go to the gym or earn money for a joint vacation. Admiration for another man should be caused by jealousy and a feeling of indifference, not anger and anger.

The most effective method of inducing jealousy is a satisfied smile and a radiant look. It is important to let him understand that this is not his merit. If you are constantly in a good mood, he will suspect a slight hobby on the side. The guy won’t ask directly, because he’ll be afraid to look stupid and funny. But suspicions will make him suffer.

You can try going to a cafe or cinema without him, in the company of friends. The vast majority of guys will suffer in impotent rage, imagining that their halves are having so much fun without them, and they catch most of the men's gazes. He is unlikely to be able to interfere with such events, since he himself often goes out in a male company to the bathhouse or fishing.

Regular delays at work are another way to make your boyfriend jealous. If this is a one-time thing, then, of course, he will believe all your excuses, but if it becomes part of the system, then the feeling of jealousy will immediately remind itself. It will be good if you really stay late at work, this can kill two birds with one stone - you will make the guy jealous and establish yourself as a responsible employee who devotes all his time to work. Here, a promotion is not far off. As a result, a new position from the authorities, and a wedding ring on your finger from your boyfriend.

Work and hobbies as a way to cause jealousy

You can be jealous not only of other men, but also of your interests, hobbies or work. If a man shows little attention to you, there is no need to demonstrate your concern - just find something to do or immerse yourself in work. This method has its advantages:

  • You will be able to take your mind off the difficulties in your relationship. Shifting your attention to something you love is a great way to start enjoying life again. In addition, switching your attention will help you later look at your relationship from the outside and, perhaps, you will find a solution to your problems.
  • If a man is jealous of your hobby or work, he is not involved in a competitive process, as is the case with jealousy of other men. On the one hand, the effect may be significantly weaker because of this. On the other hand, if a man reacts to such an attempt to cause jealousy, you can be sure that he needs your attention, and not self-affirmation.

  • At the same time, perhaps the man will be glad that you found something to do and stopped demanding a lot of attention. Perhaps he himself is very busy, so he simply does not have enough time to spend time with you and does not have enough energy for romantic actions. It is also possible that he belongs to a certain type of person who likes to keep his distance even with loved ones. Such people require a lot of personal space, and social contacts drain them. Try to understand the reason why a man has lost interest in you - then you will find the best way to correct the situation.

This method is good because, regardless of how successfully it helps you conquer a man, hobbies and work will contribute to your personal development and peace of mind. You will be able to succeed in business, learn something new and, finally, take your mind off negative emotions in a relationship with a man.

How to make a guy jealous from a distance?


Here you need to act carefully so that jealousy, in addition to introducing ardor into the relationship, does not have the opposite effect. A guy who realized that as soon as you broke up for a while, you immediately went into all serious troubles, is unlikely to want to stay with you. Therefore, know when to stop when you make your loved one feel jealous. Here are some tips to help him miss you even more.

  1. Don’t call him 10 times a day, and when he calls, don’t immediately rush to the phone, pick up the phone after 6-7 rings, and in general, not every time. Do not call back immediately, but after 30-40 minutes, and answer the question “why is it taking so long” rather vaguely.
  2. Let's understand that when you're apart, don't sit and wait for him at the window, but spend your time varied and fun , lead an active and eventful life. You are always in a hurry to get somewhere. Don’t let conversations on Skype or online correspondence last too long - remember, you are a busy, interesting person, you have a wide range of interests, such a girl is worth a lot.
  3. During the next conversation, tell him that you changed your hairstyle or hair color , or changed your image. It is a well-known fact that a girl in love always changes her style to appear more beautiful, more perfect, will make him count the days until he returns.
  4. You can also tell in detail how last weekend you and your friends visited a nightclub or bowling alley. The main thing is not to invent too much and not to go too far with unnecessary details.

Self-care as a way to cause jealousy

There are many ways to make your husband jealous and afraid of losing you. The best way is to take care of yourself, update your wardrobe or even change your image. Beautiful lingerie, sexy outfits, heels, a new hairstyle and pleasant perfume - all these methods cannot even be called manipulation, but they will definitely help to regain the attention of the person you love.

  • If you work on your own image to make your image even more attractive, the men around you will begin to pay more attention to you. You don't even have to flirt and do all sorts of tricks - just be yourself. You can appear in a sexy dress at a party with your husband without refusing to communicate with other men, or post photos from a professional photo shoot on social networks and wait for your lover to read the comments. For those who are interested in how to make someone jealous by correspondence , the last option is especially suitable. Looking good is a way to attract maximum male attention without making any effort.

  • It is important for a man that a woman constantly changes and that there is a mystery in her. A new hairstyle and beautiful lingerie will make a man fall in love with you again, not to mention jealousy. When a man is jealous, he usually just wants to gain primacy among your suitors; the very fact of conquest is important to him. However, minor changes in your image will allow him to look at you from a new perspective and create a much stronger attachment than competitive spirit creates.
  • A trip to the beauty salon and shopping will definitely lift your mood, and a new sexy look will help you feel more confident. A person is treated the way he treats himself. If for some reason you are not very confident in yourself, this is reflected in your behavior. Perhaps it was your insecurity that could cause a lack of attention from a guy or even a breakup with the person you care about. If you feel beautiful, attractive and happy, your man will probably begin to appreciate you more.

There are many ways to make a man jealous - some of them are more effective within a relationship, while others are suitable for making your ex jealous. One way or another, try to resort to such manipulations extremely rarely and implement such scenarios unobtrusively. Otherwise, the relationship you want to save may only get worse.

How to make a husband jealous of his wife on maternity leave?

Making your husband jealous while on maternity leave, when you are literally “attached” to a small defenseless bundle and spend all your time at home with him, is quite difficult, but sometimes necessary. And some women still manage to make their husband jealous and thus refresh their feelings. Here's what they do:

  • as soon as possible after giving birth, they try to put themselves in order - lose weight, refresh their appearance, if necessary - make amendments to their wardrobe in order to look well-groomed and stylish;
  • despite the need to be with the child, they are looking for an opportunity to leave him for a couple of hours with his husband, mother or nanny in order to take care of himself (this is not only about appearance, it could be some kind of courses or training to improve skills);
  • They don’t “forget” about themselves - no one canceled meetings with girlfriends in cafes. After such gatherings, people come home happy and mysterious;
  • even after a walk with the child they come home in a good mood , on the go making up unobtrusive stories about how a stranger carefully helped lift a stroller or carry a bag of groceries, or about how on the playground she got into a conversation with a sociable daddy of the same age as your baby;
  • from time to time they read some SMS on their phone , smile and pretend to delete the message; they talk on the phone only not in the presence of their husband , they correspond on social networks so that the husband knows that there is interest there, but has no idea with whom his happy and mysterious wife is exchanging messages.

When is jealousy useful?

Jealousy has a preventative effect and is considered the ideal way to regain former passion. Every girl should know how to make a husband who is uninterested in love be very jealous and afraid of losing his wife.

It is worth resorting to such radical methods in moments when feelings cool down. Men are capable of losing interest in everything, including their beloved. The main signs of loss of interest are:

  1. Lack of initiative. The partner doesn’t care where to go or what to do. For him, watching TV is as exciting as traveling the world.
  2. Boredom. The guy doesn’t want to talk, constantly yawns, and tries to spend more time in splendid isolation.
  3. Relationships don't develop. The husband does not take the first step to gain new sensations.

It is at such a moment that you should make your husband jealous.

How to make someone jealous via VKontakte correspondence?


There are only a few rules that will drive your “target” crazy with jealousy, even over correspondence on a social network, for this:

  1. Don’t rush to respond to his messages right away - wait a few minutes, and sometimes hours. To his questions “why are you taking so long to answer?”, answer with light, humorous “excuses” that do not look too truthful, this way you will kindle his interest.
  2. From time to time , disappear for a few days , and then return to the network, being in a great mood, responding to the target’s messages with a dose of humor and favor.
  3. Sometimes make a mistake when sending a message . Write something harmless (by no means a love confession or anything like that) and send it to the candidate for your heart. But he must understand that he received this message by mistake, and it was not addressed to him, but to another guy. You will inform him about this by unobtrusively apologizing.
  4. And, of course, your most important helpers are statuses. Update them from time to time , let them be related to your feelings, but do not need anything too serious. Let the guy guess whether your thoughts expressed on the wall in VK refer to him, or to another object.
  5. interesting photos on your page in which you are not alone, but surrounded by friends and girlfriends, but do it unobtrusively - let him see how busy your life is.

His interest will be piqued, and if he closely follows your “movements” on the Internet, he will definitely become jealous.

Prohibited Methods

There are a number of control methods that should be avoided:

  1. Sexual blackmail. Movies show how girls gain favor by refusing intimacy. This tactic must be abandoned. For a man, sex is a physiological need. Denial of it can provoke betrayal and separation.
  2. Displaying other people's gifts. Constantly talking about how pleasant it is to be in the company of colleagues will infuriate your husband. He will doubt his wife’s fidelity and go looking for someone on the side.
  3. Bad humor. There is no need to joke about the fact that you regularly date other guys. Many words are taken at face value, so you should stop being sarcastic and start talking normally.

READ How to stop being jealous and screwing yourself up: advice from a psychologist for women

Love is unpredictable. Often people forget that she is the basis of the relationship, so sometimes it is worth using “dirty” methods to remind your husband of his feelings for his other half.

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